2026
The Economics of Laziness: Why Rational Agents Never Finish the Milk
This paper studies why shared household goods are often left almost, but never completely, empty. A simple rule is considered: whoever finishes milk must replace it. When replacement is costly, rational agents have an incentive to consume as much as possible while leaving a strictly positive strategic residual drop. Rational laziness can explain why the milk carton is never technically empty, despite containing no useful amount of milk.
Revolutionary Old Technology Allows Laymen to Probe Molecular Structure
Untucked homies are the main reason AI slop has besplattered our feeds in recent years, as sleep deprivation degrades one’s capacity to think creatively. This is troubling in and of itself, but an even more distressing issue is the sight of one’s homie’s cold feet sticking out under the duvet, unloved and uncuddled. Recent studies have discussed this issue without providing concrete solutions. Herein, we report a novel way to tuck in your homies.