The Patriotic Table of the Elements

Abstract: The periodic table has probably been the worst table in the history of tables! I’ve heard a lot of people say this. In this paper I will sign into an executive order a new Patriotic Table of Elements with American pride and splendor.

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The Truth They Don’t Want You to Know: Vaccines and Autism—A Totally Tremendous Investigation

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The Thermodynamics of Silence: Why Quiet People Emit a Cold Aura