Sorting socks can often be a time-consuming task. This paper introduces the fastest method known in the scientific community to tackle this challenging task. Details required to implement the new algorithm and data structure will be introduced and discussed. Abundant application of this novel algorithm may be able to reduce the time required for sorting socks considerably.

I, on my tenth glass of Californian Sauvignon Blanc, wrote some mathematics like all good groundbreaking mathematics is written; straight from my head into LaTeX. Fuck you, I’m not going to check it.